Cherish Those You Love

This was written 10 years ago.  As I read it again after resurrecting this blog, I decided to leave it, as it truly still speaks from my heart.  Only a couple edits here and there and some additions but I did leave  most of it as it was.

(At the time of this writing, it was 2 years from my father’s passing away.)

I felt compelled to write this, because I was at my mother’s house and happened to find the first love note that my father ever wrote to her.  He must have been about 21or 22 years old, Mom was still in high school.  I wish the written word could express what my heart felt as I read it.   My parents had been married for about 55 years.  Mom was devoted to his care to the end.  I felt the rapid passing of years as I read that love note and thought of those I love and cherish, and hope and pray that they know the love in my heart.  

My father’s passing away from us was a slow and sad experience.  He was a highly intelligent man.  He was an electrical engineer and his claim to fame is that he designed the motors for the soil sampler arm on the original Viking space craft to Mars, in the ‘70s.  His name is up there on Mars to this day.  But a few decades and strokes began to take him away from us.  He slowly lost the ability to do everything that was fun to him, working in his work shop, even using his VCR and doing crossword puzzles.  Eventually, he couldn’t communicate with us any more, couldn’t care for his simplest needs and could hardly feed himself.  But he recognized us and he smiled and was able to say “I love you”.  The last words I had for him, was to tell him that I love him.  He looked pained and sad, like he wanted to respond but couldn’t, so I told him “And I know you love me too.”  And his whole face relaxed into a smile and I prayed a sincere, tearful prayer, kissed him on the head and hugged his neck.  About three hours later, my sister called to tell me that he had gone to be with Jesus.  I was happy, because I was praying that God would bring him home, but my heart was broken, because I was already missing him for so long and our loss was finalized.  My mother was devoted to his care to his last day.  My heart ached horribly for her too.  She was and is a strong, brave woman.  We both talked of times when we broke down in tears thinking of my father.  Mom would tell me not to cry when she goes … I just laugh at her … “yeah, right Mom.  I’ll just go on my merry way and forget about you …. NOT!!!!”

This week is a week of mixed and muddled thoughts and emotions.  My birthday hit this week (this was written in October 2007).  It’s another year that I have to account for.  Have I walked with God the way I should?  Have I honored him and loved him with all my heart?  Have I cherished my relationship with Him?  How far have I gotten in my life’s goals, have I cherished and cultivated the skills and gifts God has given me?

Eight years later, on September 30, 2014, we received an emergency call from the care facility where my disabled brother lived.  He was in the hospital, getting tests, MRIs, CAT scans etc.  He had a brain tumor.  During my birthday week, he had surgery to remove the bulk of the tumor.  We wanted to give him a chance, we wanted to see if God would intervene and help him to live and overcome the tumor.  On my birthday, we received the biopsy results, it was the worst type of tumor a brain could hold.  On June 29, 2015, he climbed out of his disabled body, healthy and whole and moved on to his joyful and eternal rest, where we who love his Lord, will see him again.  In spite of his inability to talk, sing or pray if we mentioned prayer or Jesus, his face would light up.

Why am I pestering you with these things directly from my heart?  I just could not keep it to myself.  I wanted to share this with you, because we all need to think about how well we cherish the good gifts God has given us.  Please CHERISH THE ONES YOU LOVE!

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3 thoughts on “Cherish Those You Love

  1. Hi Sis,

    I’ve been thinking about Dad a lot, too. Started a blog on Memories Worth Remembering, because you know my memory isn’t as good as yours, and if I’m going to remember, I’d better put it down quick. I think if you click my name it will take you there.

    I hope you had a wonderful birthday…October is a month of mixed feelings, isn’t it?

    Love you,
    Claudia

  2. I wanted to let you know that this touched my heart. We lost my Dad last May 25th on my Birthday. He also could not really talk much and I had gone to TN to see my son and my grand-babies. Thinking I would be there for 3 months and it turned into 5 as our van died. But way before we came home to New York, mom called to say Dad wasn’t doing good and could we come home. I had been calling him daily, sometimes a couple times a day. He could talk then… I think that is the hardest part for them and for us ( when they cannot tell us what they want to say. On May 24th My oldest son Wesley, my youngest son Daniel and I arrived back in New York and went to see my Dad. He couldn’t talk to us or get the right words out. All my siblings were there, we took turns visiting him and at one point I think we were all in there. Dad tried to talk, tried to tell us things but not much was audible. I hovered around his bedside and talked to him, he would follow me the whole time with his eyes and each time I would stop near his side or at the end of his bed , he would look at me and say ” Hey “…. and I would ask him what he wanted, ask him if he wanted a drink and he would shake his head no… At one point I was standing at the foot of his bed, thinking we would never get a chance to hear his thoughts again or know what he thought of us. My son Daniel 9 at the time was there and had said Hi to Dad. Dad and Dan would sit and watch tv and talk weekly on our proverbial pizza night at home before we went to TN. But that day in the hospital , though none of us could understand Dad much and he was very weak and not moving a lot….. out of nowhere, Daddy lifted his hands way up in the air and Literally hollered out ” Daniel ” and everyone went silent and cheered… Daniel was like What ? To me it was a spiritual thing and a way of Dad letting me and Daniel know that we were important to him. That he loved us and wanted Daniel to know that. It was the most loving thing that he was able to do. It will forever be in my heart, that he loved my son so much that he mustered the strength and hollered his name, lifting his hands high in the air…. It was akin to reading about Aaron holding up Moses hands in the bible. You know I can only hope and pray that before I pass from life to eternal life that I pass on to my kids my belief and faith in our Lord Jesus. To instill in them the desire to serve the Lord, like my Dad did with me. Dad and I were very close all my life… On my Birthday it was raining and I was in my moms kitchen sitting by the window, thinking about my Dad. My siblings all wandering through the house. I prayed a prayer… Lord if it be your will even this day, my Birthday wish is that Dad would go home to glory and be with you and no longer in pain. and literally not more then 3 minutes later my birthday wish came true and my mom called to say that he was gone home to heaven. She had turned around to get something, heard him take a breath and turned back and he was gone. Life is but a vapor and we do need to cherish those we love….. Children Obey your parents…..Honor thy Father and thy Mother… I am glad you left your post here to read. The Lord knew I needed to read it this morning… so I may have been on Facebook, doing what I do for Authors and Books, but I saw you post about your blog and how you have been enjoying books… So Good Morning from Red Creek, NY !!!
    Blessings,
    Linda Marie

    Linda Marie Finn
    https://www.facebook.com/FaithfulAcres
    Faithful Acres Body Soul Spirit
    http://faithfulacresbodysoulspirit.wordpress.com
    Faithful Acres Books
    https://www.facebook.com/FaithfulAcresBooks/

    1. Thank you, Linda. That was as much from my heart as what you wrote. I’m dealing with losing my mother soon. I don’t know when, but she has dementia and hasn’t been doing very well. But she loves Jesus!! and that’s all that counts. Hugs to you and God bless you for your reply.

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